Not a fan of the taper!!!

taperCaution: I am focused on running right now as my first ever marathon is getting closer so if not interested in reading about my crazy running struggles you might want to stop now!

As I start this thing called a taper for the first time ever, I have noticed something, my shorter runs are awful!  I am not sure why.  Is it the anxiety of knowing the race is soon?  Is it the pressure I have put on myself to even run this far?  I don’t know.  All I know is that what use to be the worst part of my run, the first 3 miles, has now lasted until mile 5 where I get some strange burst of energy.  The one good thing that has come out of it is that I am pushing beyond my limits and that is happening with almost every run.  I hope this bodes well for the marathon.  Each day I go out (and fortunately I have been able to go outside to do these runs) I tell myself the minimum amount I want to run and I push myself to make it that far and then I challenge myself to go a little farther.  I hope/know this will help with the run.  These mind games I keep playing with myself seem to be working.  Today, I set out to do 3 miles and ended up doing 6.25 miles.  Yeah for pushing a little harder! taper1

I know I need to taper and if you ask me a taper would be running once or twice a week for as far as you think you should go.  But I am trying to actually follow a plan for the taper so I don’t over train (I assume that is worse than training to much).  I almost feel like I am running more days but getting less distance or maybe I am just getting anxious like I said earlier.  Starting to question my sanity a little more!  Dreading every run until the big one because I am scared?!  I don’t know but like I have said in the past, I am my own worst client so this running that use to get me out of my head is now so in my head that I can’t get out of its way.  HELP!!!!  (Fairly certain tomorrow is a day off from running!  It is supposed to be raining and cold anyway!)taper2