Therapist/Counselor vs. Advisor

therapist2Sounds like the same person right?  That’s what I use to think before I got into the therapy world and unfortunately I feel like many people who seek therapy are really only wanting advisors (this is not everyone but quite a few). 

To me an advisor is like a financial advisor they tell you to put your money here and everything will turn out great.  They are specific (sorry if you are a financial advisor and this is not how it works, it is just my perception).  Even a close friend can be an advisor.

A Therapist/Counselor is someone who you tell your issues to and they point out things like challenges and how you have overcome them in the past and help you figure out what you learned from those challenges to help you in daily living now.  They get you to think differently by looking at things differently.  Never giving advice!  In fact once you get into therapy and you seek advice and it is given, chances are you are not going to follow it anyway and if you do and it turns out wrong, you are going to blame the therapist who told you to do that. therapist1

Why the comparison then?  Well probably just for awareness sake.  I have quite a few people who sit across from me and ask, “What should I do or what would you do?” (as if how I would handle it would magically fix all their problems).  Life is complicated.  If you add on to everyday family life with the addition of unemployment or for that matter never been able to hold a job for very long because of the chaotic world you live in, a therapist coming in 1 hour a week or even biweekly is only going to give you someone to vent to.  You have to decide to make the change.  You have to want to make life better.

I’ve written quite a few times here recently about my struggles and I’m a therapist!  I live in this world too.  I don’t always listen to what is going on and make the best choices, but I try.  And if it doesn’t work, I live with it until I can make a better choice next time.  The only advice I can give is to me besides I’m the only one I listen to most of the time anyway (probably because I’m stubborn and set in my ways.)

So next time you want advice you need to seek out a friend (or financial advisor) but when you want to change and don’t know how you should seek out a therapist.Therapist